A Busy Mom's Guide to Staying Organized with Multiple Children.
No one ever warned me about the chaos, disorganization and noise that would ensue welcoming five children into this world. My grandmother, an amazing mother of seven, always chuckled at every positive pregnancy test followed with a hug and a "God bless you, dear." Words I naively let roll off my shoulders, never recognizing her smile and nod as a silent prayer for my sanity. That was until I was drowning in diapers, endless food stained laundry, relentless calls for "mom" and five tantrums deep by 9am. I can't forget the wellness check-ups, dentist appointments, groceries for bottomless bellies and monthly bills. And did I mention meeting my husband's needs, getting a shower in before I look like a neanderthal OR keeping the line of communication strong with God? Whew! Just the basics alone are exhausting no matter the number of children or responsibilities.
Admittedly, recently my days were more often than not a sloppy compilation of messes, tantrums, cuddles and giggles combined with disorganized errands, missed appointments, resentful cleaning, endless laundry and an astronomical amount of caffeine. Only to end my evenings often feeling unaccomplished, unproductive and barely descending from fight or flight mode.
All that to say I've been on a mission to get my life in order. I finally hit the golden one year postpartum mark after welcoming my fifth baby. That mark when you begin to resurface from the dense fog of mom brain. Well, the fog cleared, and I recognized that my day to day and organizational skills needed a major revamp.
I'm not a naturally organized person. I'm forgetful, sporadic, messy and an easily sidetracked day dreamer. BUT, with a solid effort and some dedication, I might just have the key to master the chaos of mom life. After some major trial and error, I've devised a solid list of practical tips and strategies to help navigate the chaos and keep things running relatively smoothly in a busy household.
• Embrace Routine:
Establishing a daily routine is the foundation of maintaining order. Create a schedule that includes fixed meal times, bedtime routines, and designated homeschool or playtime slots. A consistent routine provides predictability for your children and helps them understand what's expected throughout the day. It gives you an opportunity to schedule in some self-care, hobbies or quiet time. Use it to tackle that book collecting dust or simply to invest some intentional time with your kids. Routine provides order and a sense of control over your days even when things go awry.
• Prioritize and Delegate:
My husband works five to six days a week and is often gone 9 to 12 hours a day. I've had to learn to prioritize the essentials, and save the rest for later. I've learned to seek help from others (Hi mom!) and even my children. We all want to be supermom, but in reality, we can't do it all and we certainly don't have to do it all on our own. Delegate tasks to your older children based on their capabilities. Assign age-appropriate chores to involve them in maintaining the household. This not only lightens your load but also teaches them responsibility and do I dare say teamwork with some sibling bickering on the side. Include your family in a regular tidy-up, or reach out to family or friends to help entertain so you can escape for an errand or snag some time to complete a quick house reset. It takes a village, remember that.
• Centralized Family Calendar:
I've always been one to keep my calendar on my phone or in a pocket sized planner in my wallet, then naturally, I'd get frustrated when my husband is unaware of an appointment or event that he couldn't see to begin with. I recently bought an obnoxiously large calendar for my desk where I've dumped every appointment, bill, chore and grocery day. I've since discovered that maintaining a centralized family calendar to keep track of appointments, extracurricular activities, events, and more helps everyone stay informed and prevent scheduling conflicts. Even if you're still the only one using it. Consolidating it ALL makes it easy to look at your life at just a glance.
• Meal Planning and Prep:
Meal planning is a game changer. Not only will you feel you've got mom life down pat, your wallet will thank you too. Plan weekly meals in advance and create a grocery list accordingly. Instead of walking into the grocery store aimlessly and hungry (a dangerous combination), you'll have a game plan and intentional purchases prepared. Consider batch cooking or preparing meals in advance during weekends. This saves time and ensures that meals are readily available even on the busiest days. I've recently gone as far as listing out breakfast and lunches to reduce and in some cases, eliminate decision fatigue. The general day to day is busy enough with kids, anything you can do to lighten the load or decision making in the heat of a busy day is a welcomed task.
• Declutter Regularly:
An organized space reduces stress and chaos. Regularly declutter areas like playrooms, bedrooms, and common spaces. Donate or discard items your family no longer needs, making room for the essentials. I do my best to declutter on a monthly basis. You'll be shocked to discover that the more you declutter, you almost train your brain to recognize the nonessentials; thus making that donation box a lot easier to fill and your space a lot easier to manage. My best tidbit of advice is to keep a donation bin easily accessible in your home. It's much easier to declutter when you can make a decision and remove an item immediately, versus storing it for a later discard date.
• Use Technology Wisely and Embrace Paper:
Leverage technology to your advantage. Use apps to manage shopping lists, meal plans, and appointments. Additionally, set alarms or reminders for important tasks, like curbside pick-ups or extracurricular activities. At home, Alexa is my second brain when it comes to reminders. I also carry a notebook everywhere I go, in my home or out and about. Brain dump everything on your mind then organize your thoughts later. You'll be amazed how much space is taken up just trying to remember it all. You'll feel lighter, more productive and confident as you tackle your days.
• Create Individual Spaces
Give each child their designated space for belongings. This teaches responsibility as they learn to tidy up their own areas. It also prevents disputes (and a headache) over misplaced items. We live in a small home with one closet and little to no storage. I recently designated drawers to each of my children for their personal belongings. I was surprised to see them take pride in their drawers and their belongings. They respected each other's belongings and were far more inclined to pick-up toys so as not to have them reclaimed by their siblings.
• Stay Flexible:
While routines are essential, it's equally important to remain adaptable. Unexpected situations will arise, so be prepared to adjust your plans when needed with an emphasis on remaining calm through the transition or change in plans. This has always been a point of weakness for me. I thrive on consistency and routine. I enjoy being sporadic, but not when it's out of my control. As a parent, this has been a major life lesson that I've had to recognize and adjust too. Flexibility is key with children. I've discovered laughter is the best medicine for overwhelm and going with the flow has become a way of life. My favorite thing to do lately when things get too loud, messy and tensions rise- I pile the kids in the car as is and drive to the local trails. I unload them and let them run. The smiles return, the stress leaves us all and the mess and crazy stay at home. It's been a way for me to control a needed change while adjusting to the challenges that come with so many young children in a small space when things aren't going as planned.
• Self-Care Matters:
Remember, you're the heart of your family. Make time for self-care, whether it's a quiet moment with a book, a short walk, or a relaxing bath. Taking care of yourself enables you to better care for your children. I always say that you can't pour from an empty cup. Refill your cup so you can overflow into others.
• Embrace Imperfection:
Finally, remember that no one is perfect. No day is perfect. There will be days when things don't go as planned even in the slightest, and that's okay. Embrace the chaos and cherish the beauty that comes with a bustling household. These seasons are brief and fleeting. Be content in the moments and strive to put forward your best effort. That's all your family can ask of you and that's all you can ask of yourself. Being a mom of any number is undoubtedly a challenging role, but with the right strategies, staying reasonably organized is achievable. By establishing routines, delegating tasks, utilizing technology/paper, and practicing self-care, you can create a harmonious and happy environment. Remember, it's not about perfection; it's about finding balance and creating a nurturing, loving, God-filled home for yourself and your family. You're juggling life's challenges with grace and turning ordinary moments into lifelong memories. You're showing up everyday with unwavering love for your family and for God. There is no art to mastering the chaos, but there is mastering the art of love. So let go of the "Super-Mom" title. Super-mom doesn't exist, but YOU do.
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